After I tell people about the fact that I am first in my fantasy league, I lose three weeks in a row.
I’m not mentioning fantasy football again until the season is over.
My kid is great.
She is the happiest little person on earth. I wish I was as positive as she is. My favorite thing is to watch her completely turn into a ball of giggles when one of the cats pass by her. As soon as she composes herself, she immediately starts to chase them, stopping every few feet to make sure I’m watching her still.
I am feeling lonely lately
D has been working so hard. I knew about his workaholic tendencies before I moved to LA, but still, I resent it at times.
I love that he tries so hard to take care of us. But. There are so many buts.
He leaves before I wake up in the morning, doesn’t get home until after Baby E is in bed most nights, and works half days on Saturdays. He is missing so much time with her and that makes me sad. I take pictures and record videos of lots of things but still… he doesn’t really get to know her and I know that is painful.
I miss feeling like I am in a relationship… the good parts of it. Flirting and cuddling and talking about everything. The little time we have in the evenings is devoted to eating a quick meal and discussing Ella before he crashes.
I can’t blame him for being tired. I don’t know how he has the energy to keep going. But I miss him. I miss my husband.
And it’s in these moments, sitting in a quiet living room while he sleeps, that I resent the fact that his career requires I live in this state. At least if we were closer to my family and my friends I would have another way to fill all the emptiness.
I can’t get enough of her lately. At almost 7 months, the cuddly moments are rare. I’ll take what I can get, even if it’s just a game of airplane.
Healthier version of Wings?
Buffalo Falafel. Delicious.
I need a new hair style.
It’s been over six months since I last had my hair cut. It’s almost to my waist, and while that would be awesome if it was healthy and pretty, it’s not. Pregnancy and he post baby era have taken a toll. It’s stringy and ratty and mostly dead ends and annoying ass new growth.
I want something easy. Something that looks effortless, but has a little bit of edge still. I have no idea what that is though.